alot of events happened yesterday which makes me think about my past. the past me, especially in primary school, was what i would call myself literally spineless. i don't have the guts to stand up for myself. i don't take the initiative to mingle and socialise. and i'm very much a sorry girl, which means i'll apologize regardless of whether i'm at fault. yea, its so hard to imagine the kind of transformation i went through to become the Elaine today. i remember i had this best friend in primary school, when i was really young. that best friend i would name X. X was the total opposite of me. she was outgoing and sociable. but she's really petty and get angry at the slightest things. and everytime when we quarrel, i would be the first to say sorry because she never would. this kind of unhealthy friendship carried on for some time before i decided to cut it off cause its making me so tired. but she is a great friend still. its okay if we're not that close.because of this, i didn't want to get too close to any friends in secondary schools. i enjoy having friends to hang out with, but i tend to withdraw myself if i find that the friendship is getting too close. i didn't know when all that changes. perhaps its the time since i came to vietnam. i'm not that yoke lian anymore. not that spineless, sorry girl. i know how to stand up for myself, and i enjoy super close friendships with my girlfriends. i can comfort you and be a real good listener if you're sad or emo over anything and i won't judge you. somehow, anger is still a very stranger emotion to me, since i'm so rarely angry. thats why i don't understand why people get angry sometimes. oh yes, i'm super angry at the scammer, but i blame it on the stupidity of mine. i was surprised at myself yesterday. i was actually asking myself whether i'm in the wrong before i say the word sorry. a true sorry doesn't come out easy for me. now i can see the transformation i have gone through so clearly.this is just for my reflection purpose. direct to only myself and nobody else. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
i hate sharks. and i'm still waiting for twinny to post here.i hate computers.i'm waiting to use my handphone when i reach singapore.i hate falling into the sea with sharks.but i love whales to play water games with me. LOL. 
