dedicated to friends who were once very close with me:
i'm very sorry i didn't take the effort to maintain this very special relationship between us, and let all those previous built relationship go down the drain. its not because i didn't want to or because i find you really irritating. its because of who i am. i'm a lazy and pathetic fellow who really won't care whats actually wrong until i think back and tell myself, "how could i have been so ..." and that sort of thing. thinking back, if i really take the effort and heart to maintain and stay by the side of all my ex-close friends, i think i would have alot of soulmates now. to say the truth, i have lose out alot in my life all this while. sometimes, because of studies or work, i have neglected you all. its easy to tell myself that i actually prefer being alone and so on, but actually i didn't want to be. now i know how hard it really is to balance work, family, and friends altogether. but i'll still try my best from now on.to myself:
i should learn to be stronger instead. i don't believe the strong-ness that i had in the past is really gone with the wind. i had that kind of foundation right? so i shouldn't fall that easily. yea, i need to be strong, focused, and driven! i'll balance all part of my life no matter how hard it is. i'll keep on fighting!
